Whose money is it anyways?

Recently the Lord has been teaching me lessons about money.
Because I am young and want to be involved in ALL of the fun outings and I'm a college student, I don't often have a whole lot of money.

But I have to remember two things:
1) My money is NOT my money. The Lord provided me with the money but ultimately, it is not mine, it is His.
2) I am incredibly wealthy in comparison to an African or an Indian who works from sun up to sun down and still doesn't make close to what I make.

I read this verse today..
Deuteronomy 8:17-18: You may say to yourself, “My power and the strength of my hands have produced this wealth for me.” But remember the Lord your God, for it is he who gives you the ability to produce wealth, and so confirms his covenant, which he swore to your ancestors, as it is today.

I am thankful that I am learning lessons about money now instead of waaay down the road.
Lessons about how to save, how to spend, how to give easily. Why can't I give it away? It's not mine anyways! I need to be asking the Lord how He would like for me to spend it! 

The Lord has been teaching me valuable, life-long lessons, all the while Satan is feeding me lies and I take them like it's a piece of cookie cake (which is my favorite, by the way). Why do I do this? Why do I believe the silly lies of someone who has ZERO power. I'm working on that part.

Satan has been making me question my faith, silently whispering into my ears, "you aren't REALLY a follower of Jesus, are you? you don't read your bible as often as you should to really be a Christian. you just get sucked into the worldly things just like everyone else.. God doesn't accept that!" I mean, COME ON! Why, Satan, WHY? And why do I believe it? Why do I spend so much time giving in to it when I could pick up my Bible and prove him wrong. OR start yelling truths about MY GOD into HIS ear! Sorry, I'm a little frustrated with how disgusting Satan can be and how easily I give in.
You know why I think I do it? Because it is so much easier to believe you are a mess up than on the right track. It is so much easier to believe that I, Kathryn Grace Lee, could mess up in my faith. I so badly want to be accepted by God. But then I have to stop myself and remember, it's not about our acts. If you cannot tell, I am a people pleaser.. it isn't always the best. Remembering He LOVES me unconditionally is so key! UN.conditionally. He adores His children! But then I go back and think about all that God has called His children to do.. to serve, to give, to be bigger than this world. Balancing the two is SO HARD. Is it even about balancing them? Oh, Lord help me. I NEED YOU! Be my strength, my encourager, and my all!

I didn't realize this post would turn so.. everywhere. But I just need to pour my heart out. And I NEED you, whoever is reading this, to help me along this journey. I know that I cannot do it alone! I need community and wise words and encouragement from my beautiful friends! I'm always afraid to ask, but I know that I need it!

So thank you in advance! And thank you, friends, for all you've done for me in the past! I wouldn't be here today without the amazing God I serve and the incredible people He has put into my life!

And to end with one of my favorite, encouraging verses: John 16:33
 “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”

Love,
Kathryn